So, I'm pretty sure I just jacked off and my gf 17 m/o son caught me. IDK how long he was standing in the crib, but he definately saw the grand finale.
I am currently eating pure cake frosting...I am not sure how I was ever referred to as a responsible adult.
That's exactly how my pussy feels when I shave it. Like a cross between a naked mole rat and a newborn child. Embrace it.
I almost stepped in a homeless mans stream of urine as he was peeing. I love this city.
I have to answer enough questions about you, I don't need your uterus tossed in the conversation.
A BJ like that needs to be recommended.
Responsible roommate: 1. Someone who takes a huge shit at work so as not to clog the toilet at home.
Qdoba locked their bathrooms last night.. I suppose so people didn't pee all over them? I considered it counter productive considering I just peed on the outside of their building then. I had to pee
Just think Febushuary. A whole month of 70's esque bush! This is the dream
You got kicked out after 30 minutes, 3 beers and 2 shots. Group record. Also you kept rubbing his belly and calling him buddha.
You're telling me he never had to ask for a blow job and he STILL broke up with you? I call bullshit on that one.
Christopher Columbus didn't sail the ocean blue so I would have to go to class and not have sex with my boyfriend
I'm still, like... really stoked about not having any STDs
he kissed both of us goodnight when we dropped him off...I didn't know if I was more offended or impressed
The guy i took home was a circus freak. He jerked off 3 times in front me after we had sex. And he came every time.
Randomize