hi brent please bring bad word music cd must most bad word please brent bring cd music bad word please brent bring cd music bad word
Is my tampon string too long for this dress?
My therapist says she wants to work on my 'trust issues'. I think she's found the cash cow within.
I woke up to the bathroom door of steak n shake hitting me in the face at 4 in the morning...
he had two deer mounted on his dorm room wall with panties and bras hanging from the antlers... i cant believe i contributed to bambi's headgear...
Girl next to me in class just said to her friend "and I haven't even cried yet." Challenge accepted
I know I know. I considered playing it sober but after I typed out IS SHE A GENIE? I knew it was impossible to hide.
you grabbed his arm with one hand and the bottle of smirnoff with the other and headed off to your room you were on a mission
Aww you are cute. With your penis. And failures.
the whole bar just wished me luck with my booty call tonight
I just rolled over in bed and felt a bump. Turns out it was a lil nug. Talk about being princess and the weed.
I've got the dick your vagina needs, but not the one it deserves right now.
Well after the shots I danced with a homeless guy, split my toe on broken glass, and had a 20 piece mcnugget. Who says postgrad life is boring.
I told you, I'm taking a sledgehammer to your walls. Fuck your walls.
I'm Batman.
I've finally done it, I've downloaded some messenger lesbians like to use because some girl wanted to flirt.
Congrats, you're all grown up now.
I FEEL LIKE A GAY BUTTERFLY
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