Cure to hiccups..road head..high five
dude your girlfriend loves you alot..she yelled your name lastnight in bed
She passed out in my bed last night before anything happened. She felt really bad about that, so she gave me head when we woke up this morning.
You stood in front of a yellow Camaro and kept yelling at it to "Transform already!!!!".. yeah, I'd say you were pretty wasted.
dude she was givin me head and stops and looks up at me and tells me she loves me, then goes ''alright now cum in my mouth''.... pretty sure shes the one
Um I just overheard that the new guy spent a month in jail. Obvi another great hire.
he was cradling you in his arms feeding you rum straight from the bottle and you kept sucking his fingers.
I feel like delivery guys should know that when you order lunch for one and answer the door wearing sweatpants, there's no need to say "Happy Valentine's Day."
Hey so I just want to get straight to the point it was me who ate the last cupcake and it was your sister who I fucked last nigt
if i had known the extra weight would have gone to my tits, i would have started drinking years ago
Look. When I let you cum on my tits don't fuck it all up by going "SKEET SKEET SKEET" it just pisses me off.
Just walked by the barren window naked in a family neighborhood. Who needs dignity.
Pretty sure the guy at the Halloween party dressed as an ice cream man is working his way through the building without a care for gender or age. He high-fives me on his way out each morning.
my comprehension of H.D. Thoreau really dives after 8 beers.....
It will astound me if they ever let you graduate.
So if i am talking to a guy and he sends me a pic and he is wearing Spiderman button down dress shirt.... Is it ok if i dont want to talk to him anymore?
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