He wouldnt get hard, then started talking about his ex wife. I literally rolled over and started to cry
i just looked at the calendar to see when spring break is and literally stopped eating
My vagina is scared and excited at the same time. It might not be able to sleep tonight.
Was I wearing clothes when I handed you your keys. Please tell me I was wearing clothes.
She even gives head with a lisp.
I'll bring the barf blanket just in case.
It's such a good feeling to send those "I'm not in jail" texts on Sunday morning
I could hear them screwing through my bedroom wall again this morning, so I started beat boxing to the tempo.
I think she's going to be dangerous to drink with, but I'm ready for the adventure.
Would you and/or him be willing to dress up like the phantom, sing me music of the night and then bone the shit out of me? this is important.
So apparently someone caught him as he was falling. And carried him around the rest of the night.
I just told the joker that my vagina is the bat cave and he needs to infiltrate it.
He stopped mid sex to pour wine in my mouth...
Marry him.
DO NOT LET HIM TAKE CONTROL OVER YOUR BOWELS
Alcohol and video games. A solid Friday night. Even before covid
Randomize
