i love my job...i have craft hour at my desk w twizzlers
can u grab me a application
just realized I'm too high to take the plastic off a slice of cheese....
I love having hate sex.
the way i see it, im about one adderall binge away from graduating
I'm graduating. Then you'll never see me again.
We better fuck soon then
It's sad the highlight of the night was you didn't electrocute yourself again.
Beer coozy in the gym. Don't judge me.
I bet it kind of sucks while you do community service I'm getting blown in the shower. haha
Just so you know, a 6'7" tall gay man, with a martini in one hand and a fairy wand in the other, is not a force to be reckoned with...don't ask.
For graduation he gave me roses, a giraffe necklace, and a butt plug. I think this might be my one shot at true love
you'll probably come home to me baked as fuck and shirtless
I just drunkenly signed my mortgage application...
Is this how the global financial crisis happened?
hey can you send me that pic of that dude?...if this isn't Rochelle's phone...can you please find and tell Rochelle to send me that picture of that dude?
Ha! Just garden hosed my vag and thought of you.
I deserve a medal for being woke up at 6am on my day off by your mother asking where your brother is
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