Balls are like the throw pillows of the penis
turns out I still hate jay leno...even at 10pm.
the blizzard started in kansas. im debating driving to a bar now so i can get snowed in there for the game
i crunched every chip from the dorito bag and poured it in the vase. never again will i have to deal with cool ranch fingers.
What would you have done with a 40 foot neon parrot anyway?
I know eh? If a man wants to pay 7 bucks to see some boobies he should be allowed to do so in peace.
yes he does come on. what guy wouldnt want his penis named after a dragon
I'm tired and starving, and I'm pretty sure I just cost the company 33,000 dollars...fuck you and you're "you'll love going to work high" nonsense.
Have you SEEN his girlfriend?? Or talked to her? Christ almighty I'd drink every day just to die let alone black out
i know. like I have the nerve to talk about poverty. I eat peanut butter out of the jar.
THE EAGLE HAS MY PANTIES. I REPEAT. THE FUCKING MASCOT HAS MY PANTIES.
HOLY SHIT. You're my hero.
I have really important information for you regarding the furry convention this weekend
I'll be home soonish I need 4th of July sex, it's the American thing to do.
Wait. We seriously played strip beer pong at the bar last night. Who said I never came up with good ideas
My neighbors are white girl rapping to Hamilton again...
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