So thats when I found out ur supposed to put the penut butter on your balls not your dogs balls, feels alot better
She said she didn't think she should have to shave either. Guess no shave November just became no sex November.
Everything about him screamed your future.
we should become lesbians. not together. just in general.
Hahhaha I literally just rolled outta bed and went to get beer in my pj's and slippers. God I love graduating
Wanna hang out, and by hang out I mean go get plan B... and maybe lunch, but mostly plan b
In order of importance: Where am I? Where's my car? Where are my clothes? Who is this chick in the room?
Anne's couch, the bar, your car, Anne.
There is a hole in her door about 2 inch in diameter. You may see me on YouPorn
I have fireworks and redbull; let's make heart attack inducing magic happen.
Who shows up to work two weeks ago still drunk and freshly high on blow and gets a promotion and a raise? This girl. Good at business. Super good at being fucked up.
And think got sick again from going outside naked. Word to all females...don't try the naked trench coat thing.
It's disgusting. He breathes through his mouth and just sounds fat. Plus he chews all loud and shit.
I'm going to avoid eye contact because my old high school English teacher is not who I feel like seeing after I just had a dick in my mouth
Are u guys proud? I puked my brains out last night at a strip club. While my two fave strippèrs held my hair
If I don't answer right away it's because I took an Adderall and the fridge needs cleaned.
Randomize
