i wouldnt be suprised if in indian your name meant "walking lie"
Why is it that you only get to have sex when you haven't shaved your legs in six weeks and are wearing period stained granny panties?
the chair was smiling at me in sociology and i had to try not to burst out laughing.
She has 2500 facebook friends. I probably should have used a condom.
I mean I gotta puke to be skinny, wax to be hairless, and drink to be fun. Life isn't easy.
how should i feel about a person who brings a box of eggo waffles on the plane as a carry on?
And why did 3 people fail to stop me from literally getting a piggy back ride from the bar to his apartment?!
Hurry there's a dancing lesbian. She's a jumper and has impeccable jazz hands.
I feel like I'm in a bed a bagels and mistakes.
I cant be sure, but i think ive been drunk in this church before.
Getting sick, pulled the filter off a camel crush and rolled it into my joint to clear my sinuses. If there were stoner awards, I'd receive one.
I've started a list of places i want to drink. To go along with the list of places i want to have sex. Lincoln's log cabin is on both.
I'm sitting outside your room listening for sex noises eating pepperoni...slowly
Would I chase a raccoon with a flaming stick sober?
She helped me out of the car and i face planted into the snow.....and just stayed there and took like a 30 min nap.
Randomize
