Oral text is very safe with the right protection.
why did u let me go home with him last night?
u were determined it was a good idea
I didn't think her British accent was real until I saw how fucked up her teeth were.
her name was charlotte except you kept calling her chatroulette and yelling at her to show you her boobs
My own vomit just splashed me in the face. How's your day going
If he's dead I'm so gonna get the blame. I have his passport, keys and his tooth in my purse.
I should have known our good time had gone to shit when his ankle bracelet started flashing.
Congratulations on your lack of fetus.
I cannot FaceTime with your penis
He's doing his thing where I don't know if he's alive until three in the afternoon so idk
I found you in the bathroom. You were sitting cross-legged on the floor wearing nothing but socks completely surrounded by broken crayons.
The cops spotted my on my walk of shame down the boardwalk and gave me a ride home. I'm starting to make a name for myself here.
My adderall dealer raised his prices due to "impending inflation" ... never buying from a college grad again
I just woke up butt-naked in bed with a guy I've never seen..I reached into my bag next to the bed to get my phone and found a bag of shrooms, a handle of vodka, and 600 dollars that I've never seen. what do I do
enjoy it.
I’m not dating him for his personality. I’m dating him so I can steal his dog.
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