If a fat man falls in the shower and nobody is in the apartment, does his pride still hurt? Answer: yes
Omg Kevin Jonas is engaged!!!!!!
Omg really? To who. Gay marriage is only legal in like 3 states.
Never have I ever before welcomed her period with such enthusiasm. She was starting to pick out baby names. She got me "What to Expect When You're Expecting."
They are baked and once again have spent the last 45 mins talking about opening up a world wide business called "pickle on a stick"
you know it takes a lot for me to use utensils conservatively
There's sex hanging in the air like a pinata. European people are no joke.
Hey Im running from the cops. hiding in a bush. when you're approaching the intersection honk the horn twice and I will come out.
You are literally throwing a tangerine right now. Beer pong is not played this way
Bro. Some kids just drive-by judged the shit outta me.
This teachers last name is pfister and she did the fisting motion to help explain how to pronounce her name. This class might be good
Day drinking! Today! (tomorrow too!) Our place! Whenever you get off work! Ready go!
I apologize that you just fell victim to my random thought of how to make a blow job come to life via emojis.
On a scale from 1-10 how wrong is it to request "I Hit It First" at my ex's wedding reception?
Definite 12.2 but worth it.
Well I've consulted some psychics but they keep saying all they hear in my head is screaming and all they see in my future is pool noodles and cheese dip?
You peed on a flamingo?!?
Randomize
