I want to stick my p in your. b.
Ill do this for you.
You are a team player.
This is me making up for not putting my tongue inside you more.
honestly if we didnt hate the same people we would have a friendship based on nothing
Dude, she looked like the Canadian Slam Poet, neck hair and all.
There aren't nearly as many guys masturbating on chatroulette as i was led to believe...i feel cheated
He said his penis was a 1 woman penis with a conscience an I was that woman...technically a declaration of commitment rite?
All is not lost. The bondage chair came with repair seals and glue. It's like the knewwwwwww this would happen.
Wtf. I just got invited to a threeway bj session in the bathroom at boiler. Lmao
Just proved I could salsa dance in a bar where no one was dancing
Sidenote...no idea how to salsa
They installed a lotion dispenser in the bathroom at work... its like they want me to masturbate on the clock...
I think a girl on my floor is watching zombie porn. There is literally no other description for the noise coming from her room.
He talked for 3 hours straight on how his dad is a dentist how fuck do you think my night was
Damn you. I'm in a bar with Southern Jesus Fearing Blah Blah Rednecks WHO ARE PROBABLY VOTING FOR TRUMP and you go radio silent.
He had a cruise ship of a dick and I need to set sail on that ocean again
Your sister just admitted to being a " much bigger bitch" than you. So you've got that going for you, which is nice.
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