Martha Stewart would most definitely roll a great joint.
Is it a bad thing that the only time i wear nice clothes to class, is when i get too fucked up the night before and wear the same clothes i went out in?
Do you think my parents will accept my drinking habits more if I told them I like to drink every night because I take good shits the next morning?
the first sign of life we got from you was four hours later. you smiled without opening your eyes when tom whispered in your ear we were getting buffalo wings.
Hne relally is a cite oerfect gome. Nes awddddddddooooome.
found a hand written recpiet for 'one doe fawn' on an open crate in my living room need help to find it
where the hell would u of bought a deer
At least I cut out the pieces of your hair where I braided gum into it last night. Thank me later.
If I wake up with an unknown penis in me one more time I am literally going to press charges to the makers of tequila.
bad night - i tried for naughty librarian but could only manage to pull off pissed off barrista.
maybe facebook could make a notification like "someone tagged a photo of that guy you used to bang and still think is really hot with his shirt off"
Sooooooo, can scratch getting a pelvic exam by a man dressed as Woody from Toy Story off my list.
You need to write an essay about this experience.
He was even wearing the hat.
just blew him in the library. I am a classy dame
Bruise count after new years, 7. 2018 is looking up.
I think I left my thong in your bed. Careful. It has the power to destroy the agitator on a washing machine
Of course he did! You’ve seen my tits, you know he didn’t stand a chance!
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