Wanna demo a makeout? Check box yes or no. Or maybe. Okay bye.
bella threw up all over the kitchen floor then looked at me, laughed, and walked away
isn't bella the cat???
that she is
I just made a 90's Nickelodeon TV theme song power hour mix...I don't want to build it up but your head might explode
SHE has hooked up with both me and my sister. I don't even know what to say. If she goes for my parents next I may have to kill her
Home remedy for the herp. Black tea. I need to strap teabags to my wang.
I made a drinking game out of watching your DUI video, everytime you say " okay, well thats just your opinion"
And it was confirmed to me that I did in fact cut my girlfriend out of her dress with my sword.
this is worse than the time i threw up a condom.
I need to stop drinking alone, I wrote a love letter to my tattoos
Get up, biotch, before I come traipsing in there to rip apart whatever god-forsaken spoon you have going on between the two of you and your dog.
I went out to have a smoke, and next thing I know, he's got me bent over a picnic table praying to deities I don't believe in. You should have been there.
The cops wrote boobs in the police report. ...vandalism is our calling
I'm sorry I lead life with my vagina.
she compared me favorably to her vibrator
which one?
I guarantee you he will only fuck with old bitches from now on
Randomize
