Every now and then I'll talk to a creeper for an extended amount of time. Randy, for instance, funded our entire night of horrible decisions.
How do u explain cocaine to a 9 year old?
oh and i'm sorry i sold you for three cigarettes last night
I'm about to do the walk of shame in a christmas onesie. What would I do without christmas sweater party season?
Any clothing i put on is too many clothes.
Now I don't feel so bad about telling everyone that he's 23 and needs Viagra. It's her problem now
If you can find a Canadian Lesbian to have pity sex with me, let me know.
I just had some kinky fun in the back seat of my car behind a Ralph's in south county. How's your thanksgiving eve?
When you are 21 it's acceptable to run out of the tavern and puke all over the bike rack... when you are 35 it's called alcoholism.
Is it bad that I'm using the photo I took for my fake ID as my linkedin profile pic?
And that is why I love you so much. You have the same cold black heart as me.
Drink drank drunk tankkkkn, LETS GO
Don’t worry I was with my ex husband for 10 years and he could never remember the year I was born, when our dating anniversary was or what year I graduated high school. But I still know that mother fuckers SSN lol
It's difficult to focus on bonds when you know your classmate peed in your mouth
Eventually the conversation shifted (as it always does) to Sex toys.
Randomize
