I don't know how to say this, but I think you're a fucking bitch and the sooner you die I'll be happier.
Sorry- wrong number! :)
either my laughing turned him on, or he wanted to shut me up. either way, i dont care. it was amazing.
I was passed out on the dog bed yelling "I UNDERSTAND"
in line at jewel. the cashier is puking in a garbage can while ringing up customers. glad to know im not the only one that 2012 is kicking in the face already.
Sometimes you gotta say "hey, its been a long semester. Let's puke before 10"
And as cleavage season comes to a close, so blooms a new season of yoga pants. And the people rejoiced.
My dick can't jump between your dick and her mouth, man. It's impossible, I think.
I just looked at your pics on Facebook....there was cake? Where the fuck was I!?
So his shoes are still here. And there are three contacts in a case. And a shirt on the bed. I've checked my dorm and he's not here. I'm so confused.
That would be a mascot riding an ATV at a semi-professional hockey game, if that doesn't sum up how I've been I don't know what could
I mean seriously, she can have his dick anytime and im over here salivating like a thirsty bitch.
You know your Halloween costume is slutty when you have to shave your pubes to wear it.
I'm pretty sure even the managers want me to show up hungover my last day, it would be negligent and disrespectful to do otherwise
I’d say they were worth it. He screamed “your tits are fanfuckingtastic!”while he was cumming
It's fucking 2020, I should be able to watch Netflix in the buff while making brownies without you getting preachy about it.
Randomize