Umm. Any where really. Alcohol and boobs. Those are the requirements.
Let's just go topless and paint glitter over our nipples who the fuck cares
Still not exactly sure how i unbolted your toilet from the ground.
just spent $80 on an im sorry breakfast from mcdonalds for everyone sleeping in my apartment for being a drunkass and locking everyone out of the apartment at 2am.
Don't remember shit. It was only until I saw the glaze on my forearm that I knew you drove to get donuts last night. I also spent 20$ there apparently
You could become Eskimo brothers with my dad. How can you pass that up? You pussy.
Yes she scared me. She had NIPPLE CLAMPS ATTACHED TO A STUN GUN.
Drinking Patron always ends with me puking or receiving anal. So make your move when I start ordering it.
Can you think of a sexual word rhyming with snorkel?
You know you're too drunk when you start calling people out for unfollowing you on social networks.
Just got up.... With the club stamp on my ass.... How did it got there????
My friends say stay away from him but it’s still 2017 so I’m allowed to make shit decisions until midnight hahah
Like he was cock blocking and it usually takes ten cocks to block this cock
I couldnt face her after that wonderful, terrible blowjob. Made a rope out of towels and climbed out her bathroom window.
My boss just offered me a vodka mixed drink at work I do not have a real job
Randomize
