this chick on a show just showed her boobs and let some guy paint them others asked why she did it and her reply i quote "i was bored" why dont chicks get bored more often
bad decision saturdays are such a good decision
Aw c'mon. You have to see if the spinning penis rumor is true.
All I remember is doing a naked tuck and roll of your bed.
I'll send you the picture of you double fisting vodka bottles, grinding one guy and making out with another... Every girl wanted to be you.. You make me so proud!
I was up all night on suicide watch. Dave was wasted and tried to strangle himself. With his own hands.
Have you ever noticed that the cities in car commercials look really futuristic?
...did you eat that brownie?
Doing lines off a plate that says, "things go better with coke."
I broke out the Krispy Kreme, and am possibly having random internet sex in less than an hour. I think I got this breakup under control.
I just want to be like i dont know you but ive seen your penis & i like it
Guys, as my favorite vagina consultants I have to share something.
My professional advice is not to put lemons in your lady pocket.
so much tequila, so little girl.
I just tried to get a motorcycle cop to give me a ride....he told me not to ask strangers for rides
This morning when you were fucking me you said you'd go to the store and get me tampons and a 30 pack
When a guy asks for your ig but you already know his blood type, social security number, & mother's maiden name.
Randomize
