would it be rude to tell a homeless man that he should sell the lebron jersey and brand new nikes he's wearing if he's really that hungry
yes, the chronicles of narnia is exactly what happens when you do crack inside of a wardrobe.
Just spent 3 hours on the Mcdonalds website. I don't know what to do with myself now that college is over.
Wedding cake is always the best dance partner. In the corner. With a jack and coke. And while I'm crying. Listening to "Almost Paradise".
Come over we're drinking with orange soda as a chaser to honor 90s nick kenan and kel.
Why are you surprised? I've only ever liked older guys since I was a 3 yr old crushing on her pediatrician.
Just had a flashback to Friday. Definitely had my hands in someone's bra. Definitely wasn't mine.
Wait.....I ate a raw potato lastnight.
I'm watching the World Cup in bed naked with john and our USA flag aviator glasses. Can you say America?
i got kicked out of McDonald's for demanding a margarita mcflurry
You know you went through something intense when you actuallu applaud yourself for not shitting your pants
Literally the fucking master of salvaging the possibility of a blow job whilst also crushing somebody's dreams.
I will go to bed dreaming of sexy Olympians carting me on a throne to the beach where they feed me pizza and champaign and massage my head/wash it like the hair dresser does.
Is there an "I fucked your brother" emoji?
Coffee and girl scout cookies. Breakfast of champions.
Get fucked.
Randomize
