tell her no need for introductions. and that you've read about her on the back of toilet doors.
I Just realized that having a picture folder that says "not for mom" may give off the wrong impression to wondering eyes
This girl brought half a watermelon to class. I want to be on her level.
I'm hoping he'll tell everyone how great in bed I am. Well, how great in bathroom floor I am.
I went to grab his drink and my hand grazed his dick. It was magical.
you better take a shot tonight for every cat you have ever seen and wanted. this is a lot of cats.
Reunion weekend was a success. Had 3 ex's inside my vag. Hat trick!
Perfect. Let's do that. I'm thinking everclear and green dye as our base. We shud start from there
Nothing with ever convince me that she wasnt purposely left behind by our mother to ruin my life and fuck our family
I warned you. Don't come crying to me when your vagina refuses to forgive you for this.
I feel like my map app knows I'm hungover and is strategically not driving me by fast food places so I cannot stop
Idk how much of a virgin he is but I'm tryna find out.
The guy got mobbed on, all hell broke loose. About 20 cops showed up, and this kid somehow convinced a cop that letting him pee in front of him is justifiable. This guy could sweet talk Hellen Keller, he was THAT good
The fact that a spice girls song is stuck in my head is a great sign that my decisions aren't the right ones at the moment...
On a scale of having tea with Ghandi to the apocalypse how bad of an idea is it to drink with a 100 degree fever?
Randomize
