Spraying perfume on pants makes them clean right?
Last nIght I drank wIth the new guy from fellowshIp & my pastor I've known sInce I was 7. It was agreed by them that I had nIce tIts. I'm not weIrded out In fact I'm flattered...
just took my exes job. there should be an award for how many times I've managed to fuck that girl's life
There comes a time in a man's life when he's almost thirty he just needs to stop watching Degrassi. This is that time.
She said I walked up to the McDonalds counter and ordered just a cup full of pickles then proceeded to offer some to everyone in the place.
It's a special occasion. Hence the 151.
hr gave me pretxwk salad and a doubke shot of grey goose. i approve! tou guys are a beautidil couple.
Went to 3 separate liquor stores today and I just made a huge tray of jello shots. This will be the Thanksgiving that puts all the others to shame.
I'm going on a new diet. It's called the "eat healthy otherwise boys won't want to have sex with your fat ass" diet. Wish me luck.
Just saw you in traffic. You may have noticed me, I was the corpse driving the white car.
Of course I will... FYI I just gave my balls a crew cut.
There's no good way to say, "sorry your son saw me naked on top of your brother"
But no. So do not give him one damn penny. Unless they are in a sock and you are hitting him with it.
shut up and let me use my vagina as a weapon of self destruction in peace!
It's okay. I think we're back on. I just went on a dog walk with him n blew him on a sidewalk
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