She has some nice fakeys. She is also an exotic entrepreneur.
You leave me no choice. Your vagina is grounded. It can just sit there and think about what it's done.
I have come to realize that my purpose in life is less musical and more as a filter of alcohol into water.
The leasing office is hiring, so I gave them my resume and class schedule. I doubt they'll call me considering last summer at their "exotic animal" pool party I marched in with a funnel and demanded the employees chug. I doubt they've forgotten.
She wants to go as a facebook "like" for halloween, but right now her costume looks more like the hamburger helper hand with broken fingers.
You chest bumped everyone we walked by on the way home... Even girls
i want to have awesome sex and feel fuzzy.
I think the exact words were 'I'd lett him to the weirdest shit to me'
Is it OK to disqualify a potential therapist if she lists 50 Shades of Gray as her favorite book? Or is that a good thing?
I'm straight up riding in the back of my truck in a bean bag chair right now. Feet propped up and four loko in hand. Glorious.
Pretty much just farted directly in a baby's mouth on the subway
You could totally spank that new found Catholicism out of him.
If you're into enormous nipples, you should ask out my office's receptionist.
Uber driver has left leg up on the dash and turn signal on for about a mile, there's Chipotle wrappers on the floor, but she's hot. 5 stars.
Nope. Im a prince of the americas. I treat my women like future queens. Also, im drunk watching the royal wedding
Randomize
