there should be a rule against ugly people hooking up.
yeah...but then what would the ugly people do? hook up with pretty people? yeahhh..don't see that happening in the near future. plus i'm not okay with that.
so when we got to the frat house he had a travel sized toothpaste and toothbrush for me and gave me a pair of his shorts and a girl's sorority t shirt...something tells me he's done this before
Why did 20 jello shots in a row sound like a good idea last night?
I think I just got a contact from my own exhale. Def dying.
THEY HAVE VIAGRA FLAVORED GELATO
it's like getting dryhumped by a chainsaw in the very best possible way
Looking through my moms phone and find a pic if a dick. Scarred for life.
Listen it's no longer the walk of shame to class when ur leaving the frat house and the brothers ask "when are coming back home"
He threw a twenty at the stripper and asked for change
well did he get it
....yes
I'm 2 beers deep on an empty stomach, and I just wanna say, I pride myself on my use of commas
I have the overwhelming need to take care of him. Both with my vagina and like emotionally.
I have to tell him to stop eating me out so I'm not late for work; my life could be a lot worse.
sex on acid sucks though, i want to connect with the universe not your dick.
Hooked up with another cop last night. Think I am renaming my vagina "dispatch"
I smell like cotton candy and guilt.
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