she's just sitting in a corner ripping all of the filters off her menthols
How do you tell someone they are only invited if they put out?
I don't remember his name but he sat in the bathroom and gave us both advice...
He showed up in booty shorts and no shirt and said dont laugh dont ask questions and give me a fucking final and no one in class said anything we just sat there speehless
She pushed me over. She offered me a shot from her tits. We're good now
I punched some guy in the face for being an asshole then later I went to say sorry and give him a hug and he started making out with me. How was your new years?
Denial and avoidance are my survival strategies for 2013.
Denial, avoidance and beer.
Apparently the Massachusetts Bay Transit Authority severely looks down on Chinese firedrills on a public bus
Yeah but the people love.
Have you picked out a bathroom stall in which to fuck? Since you've got all this free time before her plane lands...
Dude! We had to write our address on your arm in permanent marker so you wouldn't get lost. You just showed the cabbie your arm and he drove you! Nice guy.
You kept asking us from the backseat if you were driving ok and then you kept talking to your hiccups and yelling at them to "stop it already!"
So... How much of our rent is drug money?
mcfuck me up
MCFUCK ME UP INSIDE
I continue to impress myself. Also I'm probably pregnant
conclusion: canadians have really freaky sex
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