I wonder what it would be like to be a slice of cheese.
whatever. i fb stalked him and his pic comments are witty. so i'm going for it.
She said "Lay the fuck down and ill show you how its done. Ill get us both off." I did. And she did. Best words ever said before sex.
didn't know how to tell his mom I was confused about how long we'd been together because we banged for a full year before making it official
he called me back to his office so he could lick a line of pixie stick off of my thigh
be sure to add "office slut" to your resume
All I did this weekend was get my life in order. I feel like I wasted my time.
We are having a competition to see who can masterbate in the wierdest place, right now hes winning since he masterbated on his Jr. High school bus.
This is God's way of telling me He loves me and wants me to be a cocktease.
Go forth my daughter and give blue balls to all who may gaze upon your tits.
Well if I'm going to hook up with every ethnicity by the end of undergrad, I need to be moving on
I must have some kind of deep rooted instinct that tells me when a boys virginity needs to be taken.
Does taking an old homeless guy to the strip club, buying him lap dances, and calling him pops all night count as a good deed???
Sexting my TA in lecture = awesome
My sinuses still burn from snorting red wine last night.
I've peed in two sinks in the past two weeks. No one should be able to say that.
He makes bad life choices and drives a wagon, how is that not my type?
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