it was a shit show
We all have our days. But yours might be on the internet.
can't decide if i want to get drunk or coked for this harry potter thing.. it is kind of long
aren't you going with children?
I need some transition time from spring break.. can we day drink between classes this week?
We drank a $4 handle of tequila until 5 am. Please think about that.
We raised our shot glasses and you screamed out "TO MY DAD FINALLY GOING TO REHAB!"
yeah, and when i walked in on them fucking he said "go away, i'm making sons."
I just want to jump into a ballpool of dicks now.
We bought a hamster while completely stoned and 2 hours later returned it because your mother wouldnt let you bring it in her house. You cried. a lot.
I can only only sleep there on nights I orgasm cause he snores so loud and if he leaves me hanging one more time ill probably cut off his dick from lack of sleep and frustration
oh btw ur so lucky i got stoned and passed out or we sooo would have bedazzled your dick while you slept. just sayin.
You are hereby uninvited from future Turnt Tuesdays until further notice.
We had sex on a dog bed..
I wore my Gollum shirt. It struck up a conversation AND got him staring at my boobs. That's a win-win.
Knew i was going to puke. So i grabed a bowl out of the kitcken in the dark before bed...Ended up puking into a spaghetti strainer...
They have a shelf full of jello shots, what have i gotten myself into
Randomize
