I was about to buy asher roth's album and then i realized he was a ginger. can't support
..Thats also how I think I got the lyrics from MIAs Paper Planes Sharpeed on my ass? Maybe.
rhymes with "ouble enetration"
My mom just told me that the key to a successful marriage is never seeing your partner take a shit.
i an so hammered right now. I'm about to pass out but i just found the lion king dvd and i'm so happy words don't even describe.
I'm gonna name my first kid mufasa regardless if It's a boy or girl
She's a Laker fan, her sister is a Celtic fan... no matter who wins I'm getting a celebration bj from one of them!
As per my father's affair, married men are no longer off limits.
when I sang my humps to you I meant it.
You walked in on me taking a shit and told me to hit the bong
He just dragged himself across the floor on his back claiming to be "the swiffer" help
When I take mushrooms I can feel your presence down there. I can feel where Africa is too.
He actually offered up a silent prayer thanking God for my "tremendous ass." You tell me how my night is going.
Agreed then we'll really be on our A game tomorrow. And by A I mean alcohol.
So my ex just asked for my address to send me his wedding invitation... in Europe. Awesome.
That’s basically a green light to fuck his dad
It feels like heartburn in my lungs. I'll buy 2 pounds.
Randomize
