I can't make any promises. I've tried my best to stay celibate. But if a guys on top of me, Im gonna tell him to stick it in.
What should i be more turned off about... his massive collection of condoms or that he asked me to sign my name by number 68 on the list posted on his wall?
I think the two go hand in hand.
I wish I has some fucking Fairy God Parents, I want a kit kat so bad.
At what point in time did you decide the pot head with Taco Bell was more important than all your friends.
At about the same time you guys weren't burritos.
i just jacked off to lindsey vonn, i feel so patriotic
USA! USA! USA!
i just watched a special on porn, the business isn't doing so good. You may want to wait before you start your career
So high. I just took a picture of my chewed gum so I can remember to paint a picture of it as a cloud later.
John stretched a condom over his face and tried to puke in it.
I find it worrying that she bit me in bed. Then proceeded to write her name in bite marks. All without ever losing the rhythm of our fucking.
we can fight about whose fault it is later....naked.
I think we can all agree that the size of her boobs, combined with beer, is destroying my ability to judge looks.
No it'll be my boobs and the luge part will be from my nipples. Everyone will be sucking beer from my perfectly sculpted and partially melted tits.
Apparently I'm some kind of sexual camel.
A condom was pulled out of your vagina by a doctor today I do not think you can pull off "closet" hoe anymore
I did not get pleasing results from googling “Bob Ross goat”
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