Lol speaking of weird...he just sent me a naked pic of himself that said "meow" at the bottom.
I'm making progress with her.. She actually looked at me today and gave me a dirty look. Things are going real good.
If im going to fail a midterm I might as well be drunk while I do it
Just wanted to remind you that you literally cut the underwear off a man.
this morning your mother said to me "sorry to have to meet you like this, in my sons bed" later she said "you never know whos gonna be in there. its scary sometimes"
dude he was laying on two half-naked chicks, as they rubbed him down with lotion, while rolling a joint. hes like a modern-day african king
Tomorrow morning i will black in to find a christmas tree in my room that i dont remember how i got. I love college
I am trying to think of a way to tell him about thanksgiving and the following weekend in a way that makes me sound funny and exciting and not like an alcoholic
She's just so happy...and so naked.
Is it a good time to tell him he's getting too clingy if he sent me a picture of my name spelled with Cheerios?
He put oyster crackers in his ramen noodles. Is that a thing? Because holy shit I had never thought of it before and if it's not a thing he's my new stoner hero for discovering it.
Okay so.. What's with me and guys who have more than 2 nipples
You seem like the type to go to a craft sale baked out of your mind. I like you.
We're just starting to open presents and I already need a shot. This is gonna be a long Christmas day.
I don't think there's a ladylike way to tell this guy I want to sit on his face
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