Never forget that any girl can get her way if she puts her vagina on the table.
eating taco bell the same day as formal = probably a bad idea
if we break up, blackout me is coming back, making out with everything in sight
Also, I've sobered up around 5am, in Delaware. I remember making this decision, and highly regret it now.
Only she could turn her genital wart appointment into a date night.
I woke up to him yelling "WHO SLEEPS WITH A BEER IN THEIR HAND?!?" this of course, startled me awake and made me spill the aforementioned beer. So I guess the a answer is- not this girl, not anymore. Asshole
High gym went like this: I went to Dairy Queen instead.
Just found a condom on my floor from last weekend. 2/2. The scavenger hunt is over.
God he's so convenient, drugs, an parties all in one person. He's like the Walmart of delinquency.
My therapist keeps stopping to ask what 'hooking up' means
ITS ORAL SEX CAROL
My brother walked up to us as we were making out and was like "hey man, go to town!" and winked
She said she didn't know what fireball was. We are no longer friends.
Last night you referred to my vagina as a gym for your penis
Had to lock my cat in the bathroom so I could masturbate in peace.
You know it was a good night when you wake up w/o a shirt in someone elses living room next to a pancake on a spoon in a bowl of spaghetti.
Randomize
