I thought you said his peep was too small
it is but i have no money and nothing is on tv until 7 when americas next top model comes on.
i effin hate jeff goldbloom.
but i totally would still bang him
So does your leg always twitch violently when someone plays with your clitoris? Or has my ten years of piano playing finally paid off?
It was the third Sunday in a row that I woke up in his bathtub. So no our sex life isn't that great anymore.
Apparently one comment in my womens studies class cockblocks yourself for an entire semester.
I guess birthday shots aren't always the answer
dude, my ass and shoulder hurt from that kayak last night... note to self: wood planks holding kayak from ceiling do not also hold up a human being
i think the sex is so good because i get a contact high just from fucking him
My boyfriend's brother just got out of jail and he is already telling us to steal cable. Dude.
With great boredom comes great irresponsibility.
Please tell me you're not on their roof again..
I've never SEEN someone give negative fucks before. It's actually rather impressive. I want to study under them.
It was extremely weird and uncomfortable mid blow job she looks up and says " tell me Simon Cowell makes your dick hard"
We fucked. Had a political debate. I won. So I sat on his face.
WHO CARES HE GIVES YOU TOE CURLING ORGASMS AND SAYS YOU HAVE KISSABLE SKIN AND RUNWAY MODEL HAIR....WHILE INTOXICATED WITH HIS BEST FRIEND. AND THEN HE SENDS YOU CUTE SELFIES OF THEM!!!!!!! WTF MORE DO YOU WANT FROM LIFE!!! DIE HAPPY ALREADY LADY!!!
It's officially "let him eat me out in a sundress with no panties" season. Needless to say the first date was a success.
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