FYI..good luck when you get back from work.. mom and dad know about the boy you brought home last night
haha good one..how did you even know?
we all know. he obviously didn't leave when you might have told him to.. he came down when we were eating because he coud smell mom's cooking. the dude ate with us and offered to say grace. so yeah, good luck.
Make me a promise>>> if you ever see the brats from that tv show NYC Prep walking around, you will trip them, and you wil throw drinks on them
...she's taking her top off and singing songs from Anastasia. I swear to God were solumates.
Girl next to me just said "as a guy I used to sweat but not I don't. it's awesome" Oh. My. God.
he has a puerto rico area code and says his name is johnny cash. extremely suspect
He managed to scream "cowabunga bitch" before he went down on me. Let me know if you still like him.
Apparently I told his new girlfriend to stop swallowing because she's getting fat. Oh, and I yelled this across a large room
Ive only seen a dude masterbate on a train twice, once on the Jtrain and once on the Ftrain... trust me you never wanna see where the subway turns around.
Dude made his own urinal by punching a hole in the wall and pissing in it rather than waiting in line. That is the stuff of legends.
I just kept screaming "I'm fucking a preacher's son!" Also, this water tastes like weed.
You were captain morganning on the laundry hamper and when I walked in you slingshotted a thong at me and started peeing. This all came back to me when I picked up some jeans to wear and they smelled like piss.
I mean, I love her. But not "I'll have a threesome with her." Type of love.
we gave you a glass of water and you just started yelling: TWO STRAWS, PATS AN ENGINEER HE'LL FIGURE IT OUT
Well yeah connect the two together, then you can lay down and drink.
He was like, I wanna take it slow. I took off my bra And I was like, either we have sex now or you get out.
I snuck out of his room and his roommate stopped me to tell me there was a condom stuck to my back
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