If last night was a website it would be called poordecisions.com OR uncircumcisedspanishweiner.org
hey, can i borrow that thing you never use?
what?
your penis
every time i recognize a doctor or patient at the hospital on this rotation, i just pray it's not from my blackout saturday makeout slut moments...professionalism shouldn't count on weekends
I promise a much better performance tomorrow than last night my penis has a bed time
Ok... I'm a little jealous... Grab her pig tails and ride her like a jet ski. Making motor noises is optional.
I feel like every picture I upload of him on facebook where you can see his purity ring, I should make the caption "something in this picture does not belong"
I don't know what's worse the the fact he has worn a protective cup for last 3 years in fear of being kicked in the balls. Or the fact that the one day he decides to throw caution to the wind and doesn't wear it and actually gets kicked in the balls.
Who in tha hell do u hang out with?
If you've ever wanted to get filthy in a Catholic church before 2 on a Wednesday, I might be your guy.
guy next to me on the train just pulled out two bottles of gin and a block of cheddar. is slowly making his way through all of them.
Fun fact: drinking me now steals weaponry
Is it bad form to spend company money and place an ad in the paper because I wanna nail the sales girl?
He said I could stop sending ass pics now and just say hello. I'm not sure if that means he's no longer interested, or that he's a gentleman??
I don't know where I keep finding these guys, but mi power bottoms es su power bottoms.
He is getting no nudes from me. I don't even care if I'm losing his legal advice.
I went to the nurse and she literally told me I was too sexually active and wrote me a prescription for 7 days of pelvic rest...... Hahahhahaha
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