dude, she has braces
i meant the dude w the ponytail.
i was less creeped out when i thought you were talking about the 14 y.o.
my math professor just wrote "parallel" on the board, but spelled it "pararrel". guess what country he's from
So I have some interesting news. The pizza guy called the cops on me...
I'm listening to bach and watching porn,is that a sign of depression?
Quite the contrary. Sophistication.
I woke up exactly where I passed out... on top of him yet he somehow put his pants back on
I literally just wrote "I'm sorry" in my blue book, got up and walked out
Haha that's why you never name the penis. Its like a pet, once named you will most likely get attached.
i've been lying on top of my bed for the past 20 minutes
i'm about to blow half an adderall though and try to rally
Sorry, I was unaware dragging you upstairs for sex was such an awful thing.
I have an epic ass bruise from a wheel tonight and I am drunk now because I decided vodka heals all wounds.
Worse than that. I caught my roommate jerking off to a topless stripper in gta 5.
I'm fucking blazing boy. 5hr weed sauce kicked in and my entire face feels like an 8ball of gold bond flying down a mountain of Fresh powder. Just gliding.
I walked so much yesterday and I was like holy fuck I need to do some cardio apart from sex cause this is ridic
I want to be a supportive friend to her, but I also want to sleep with her ex now that he's single.
It's a mix of hot dirty sex and week old bong water
Randomize
