Was going to watch Bolt. Fucked a stranger instead. Details later.
So you didn't like Bolt?
So after i got done, she went over and got out her gecko, I felt like I was in an X rated geiko commercial.
She stuck a Big Gulp bend-y straw up his ass to see if he could handle anal.
Ew, and?!
Well he couldn't and the deal was he had to drink something using it afterwards.
Im already sauced. Have been for hours. Its kinda my thing.
you used progresso chicken soup as a mixer last night
just took my birth control pill with a shamrock shake. happy st. patrick's day
I haven't seen him since I gave him a hand job in the hospital. I like to think I contributed to his speedy recovery.
. Drop what your doing. Were going to Knoxville for midget wrestling. It's the championship.we can NOT miss this.
I told him if he cums in my mouth he has to buy me a cake that says "sorry I came in your mouth"
Prop 8 repealed and I FINALLY got my period. Good day for America!!!
I woke up with a massive hangover and realized I still had an entire bottle of tequila in my car...so yeah, working on tomorrow's hangover.
I don't mean to crush your hopes and dreams but having sex IN the Stanley Cup isn't possible
Yes. I'm realizing that sports games are good reasons to drink. I just cheer when everyone else cheers.
I'm disgusted with myself. Who goes down on their Uber driver? This asshole
I want to meet people. Preferably ones with penises
Randomize
