the bus pole looks like a man who feels guiltyty about something
i think a pirate just stole the rest of our fucking beer. what an appropriate costume.
it's all fun and games until somebody pulls the tampon string..
just shottied a beer can with a pumpkin carver. i love October.
Pregnant only lasts nine months, being hot takes way longer to go away. So yes, I will continue to hit on the hot pregnant girl.
No one figured out why I brought along the vibrating massager.
yes, i was eatting raw cookie dough and fingering myself at the same time.... is there a problem?
and then i signed some dudes back with a turkey hand print in honor of thanksgiving
For sure shouldn't do homework after beers and joints. Just cited like 3 sentences at the end with (History, 2013)
My dog got laid yesterday. Some lady came over with her husky to breed. He did it like a champ. I was so proud
I felt like the hulk waking up from a black out except with munchies
Pretty sure my first birthday present will be a pic of an 18-year-old's cock. And I am OK with that
I somehow turned head, shoulders, knees, and toes into a sobriety test
His parents came home, and now I'm hiding in a closet; awaiting death at dawn.
You are always hiding in a closet though??
sorry for showing your butt to the bar
sorry for licking your cheek
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