She seriously needs to find another hobby other than bouncing on cock.
ok, im coming! i just found some lemon square in my bangs, washing that out..this shit is all over me! was i in a pie eating contest?
yes
did i win? did you like my outfit? or should i change, if you were horny would you bang me?
what happened last night?
u kept telling him to fuck u optimus prime style
that explains why his roommate kept saying autobots roll out this morning as i left
I just beat off to a cartoon porn video. what has my life come to
you made them have somersault races with you thru the lobby..
Does he not understand that naked slip and slide needs supervision after dark?!
Did I happen to mention where i left my keys when I drunk dialed you last night
I threw up on my way to work while listening to "the good times are killing me". this award goes to modest mouse for creating the most poetic puke ever
I just want to get drunk and wake up on Wednesday
They just dared her to tape flip flops to her tits. Entertainment value cannot be found like this in any other part of America.
Just woke up with an entire pack of Oreos in my cheetah onesie. I've been waiting for this moment forever.
don't worry about my dad. he just hates you because you're liberal, not because we're fucking.
Nothing says you made great Saturday night choices like someone's dick that you don't remember, poking you in the ass Sunday morning.
I think a major source of concern would be the fact you snorted a shot. Who does that?
I just racked up a fucking ginormous hospital bill because I came so hard I had an asthma attack
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