i was just skypeing her and i saw the vagisil medicated wipes in the corner of her room. i'll be breaking this off tomorrow
he was already passed out before we got there, so i already knew i was going to like him
So you have no knowledge as to why I am hearing loud repetitive mooing from next door?
Is it bad that I see a party full of girls I know he has fucked as a challenge for me to be the one who ends up in his bed?
Dude. That is just waaaay to much random to process after that tequila battle.
if you had such a terrible roommate you would understand. jacking off in his conditioner is just the start.
Where did this racoon skin hat, stop sign and bag full of tacos come from?
Narnia or $5 pitcher night either way
Aaaaand now he just flexed his muscles at me and said "I'm a fucking eagle!"
It will be like a scavenger hunt.. only we're looking for places to have sex.
I shaved my pussy for you. If you complain about a single hair that I missed again, you will be greeted by a bush the next time you go down on me and i will MAKE YOU KEEP GOING
Just found some confetti on my nipple if that's any indicator of how the night went
May the power of my ass compel you!!
What do I do with all this pork broth? I can't waste it.
CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG
I NEED TO TAKE A FUCKING BREAK. MY VAGINA IS SMOKING.
I would definitely ride that dick into the sunset if nuggets are involved
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