i cvme to yuor rooom...wherer are youf?
please be gone before i get back
So dude, she and I just got done having the most amazing sex, and then she rolled over and said that "lets make some tacos" and proceeded to the kitchen... naked... I'm buying the ring tomorrow
Even the French judge on the olympics would give that a 10
Its alot easier to hide alcohol when your wearing a toga..
everythings easier when your wearing a toga.
Telling me its the beginning of school is like telling me the crown royal fairy has come back from vacation.
Oh my God, that is a gorgeous man. And I wasn't even gay until five minutes ago.
I'm just going to text him the word sex repeatedly until he comes over.
Did it work?
Duh, it only took 27 texts and 15 minutes and he was at my front door.
Just did the walk of shame in front of his dad while I was wearing his gym shorts and my heels from graduation last night. Keep it classy '12
I'm going to empty my bank account and roll around in the cash. Want to join?
I let my daddy issue flag fly free last night.
Just accidentally flashed my junk to the lady helping me try on suits, it was cold in there, I don't think she was impressed.
If you enjoy dance recitals as much as I do, that's one shitty Father's Day...
I've entered the world of uncircumcised penises. It's disgusting.
Yeah but if you conceived a child on a park slide that would be pretty awesome
Ex-boyfriend shit on a ping pong table at a party last night. Taking "party pooper" to a whole new level.
is it sad that the highlight of my saturday night was waiting till 3 in the morning to hear about your saturday night?
Randomize