I feel that the whole multiple orgasm thing is god's way of saying "sorry for the childbirth deal"
lets make a pact to never make a pregnancy pact
just masturbated through my pocket at the library. hope you're enjoying your saturday night out.
My parents foreign exchange student just walked in on me whacking off. Welcome to America :)
I just had my first experience getting hit on by a guy. It was really awkward, he touched my chest and invited me to a gay bar because "women get drunk and let their guard down at gay bars"
thats actually pretty good logic
Speaking of roommates, Kelsey and I woke up to urine in our trash can. Neither one of us is willing to admit to it so we've come to the conclusion that someone snuck into our room in the middle of the night
Well, I plan on starting the night dressed as little red riding hood. Then I plan on finishing the night dressed as a shit show in a red cape.
FridayRule: If it takes you longer than 5 minutes to find a parking spot, you don't have class today
I accidentally kneed him in the balls while trying to straddle him so we ended up spending the night watching ffm porn online
I feel like satan and death had a baby that took a shit that replaced my brain.
ill dress up as a sperm donor and you can go as the cup....
Can we go out and get blitzed in celebration that they'll be no more surprise kids
You kept telling everyone that you were as sober as a camel. I have yet to figure out what that means
No. I don't like you. I like your penis. Chin up. At least I like part of you.
I WANT GRASS AND TREES NOT SOMEONE SWINGING A SWORD AROUND
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