she had a pic of herself in a bikini as the wallpaper on her iPhone... I'm sensing a Tyra banks kinda girl. shit.
He's trying to wipe up all the spilled drinks with a banana
dpoing straight shots of jhameson. boys are imp ressed. i apologize
there's no such thing as luck on your birthday, only drunken invincibility, make it happen
All I want in this world right now are Doritoessssss
OK. You going to get home safe? Who are you with?
Doritoesssssss
Has now officially visited every ER in this city in one semester.
Let me start this apology by saying you were the finest piece of ass I ever had.
I was literally convinced that the turkey wrap i was eating was keeping me alive. And i couldnt have been happier. That high.
I definitely did a line of something I don't know with a Pagan biker. I make good decisions.
Apparently we were arguing for captain seats so I shouted "who has your virginity." I got the seat.
His parents know me as "the white shoed screamer"
I've finally done it, I've downloaded some messenger lesbians like to use because some girl wanted to flirt.
Congrats, you're all grown up now.
I FEEL LIKE A GAY BUTTERFLY
I was chasing pulls of fireball with bites of a bagel and yelling at people to take tequila shots with me. I shouldn't be allowed to go out alone.
1. Why did we have the team Chirstmas party in November 2. Why didn't anyone tell me the coaches were invited 3. Why did coach get the giant vibrator I brought
I can't really feel a difference, so essentially I paid 60 bucks to bedazzle my vag.
Randomize
