Nicole vs. Life
I told her Billy Mays couldn't convince me to sleep with her
better question... why wasnt i wearing a cape the previous 20 years of my life???
Something about a hand job in a car doesn't scream girlfriend
we're on our way back. she tried to pants the waiter again.
She's the perfect storm when it comes to psycho stalkers
koolaid chicken. i marinated it for 2 hours and roasted it on a rock in a fire. it was bright blue and raw. but that shit was tasty
I'm hoping he'll tell everyone how great in bed I am. Well, how great in bathroom floor I am.
i just like, need to vent to someone
Can we skip the part where I pretend to care and fast forward to the appreciative blowjob from you?
he said he wished i had balls so he could kick me in them. then we had sex obviously
I'm the only one who goes to a bar and leaves with an extra twenty bucks and a pumpkin.
I'm having post-experience "why didn't I fuck her in a public bathroom" regrets
Just got offered bathroom sex. I've never been more flattered.
Is it weird that I'm looking up pubic hairstyles?
Bacardi 151 is like a past nightmare I'm still curious about
Randomize
