I know she is the girl of my dreams bc she orgasmed, rolled over and then asked if I knew that Orlando beat Cleveland.
Just checked my missed calls... why did you call me 37 times from 2:14 to 3:58?
Charles is a playa. And I don't mean the spanish word for beach.
I saw a chick at 8 am this morning walking back to my dorm wearing wings... I'm kind of jealous.
she wants me to meet her parents and she hasn't even met my penis yet.
the orgasm was like being thrown to the other end of reality, so getting a nosebleed from it wasnt too upsetting at that point
so not only am i rooming with two chicks on the volleyball team, but we just put down the deposit on a hot tub. this is going to be the best summer ever for my dick.
Going through my purse trying to find money for this cab but all I keep pulling out if chicken from my burrito o ate an hour ago. Help?
I need to make a new year's resolution to only pee in toilets. And it needs to start happening before the new year.
Three Architectural classes: $990.00 Architectural supplies: $300.00 Changing majors and using my architectural supplies to roll blunts: Priceless
Well she got high, deleted the essay she was working on, and then ordered dominos. We all manage stress in different ways.
I started a USA chant at the bar last night for no reason, other than being plastered. Within 15 seconds, I was standing on a table and the whole bar was chanting but nobody knew why.
So he got the TA job but i told him its not official until we have a quickie on his desk. He offered to break into his office. He doesnt start until this fall.
Are you awake? I feel like I need to confess my sins to someone not on this side of the country.
whenever i get involved w someone i'm gonna give you their number to testify to the fact that they should not fall in love with me
Randomize
