I think I just saw someone hide a body.
I got a hennah tattoo of my room number on my arm...I love spring break in Mexico!
Have you ever made a sandwich from swedish fish and tortilla chips?
Don't talk about his dick. That's mine. There's a copyright on it. Use with permission
Just saw a guy walking down the street carrying a giant inflatable penis
Just arrived at our party
Please be advised that because of last year's "incident" we will no be starting St. Pat's day with spicy breakfast burritos and car bombs. Please plan accordingly.
We had three bowls going. It was a tri-bowl tournament. Harry potter shit.
I mean you can't really blame him. He's named after whiskey and I don't get along with pants.
With a few pieces of metal and duct tape and a bong was created
I mean, with your nipple problem im surprised. #hangacoatonem
He threw a twenty at the stripper and asked for change
well did he get it
....yes
Would it be playing god to put spaghetti on my pizza?
I don't get it. Why have babies when you can have vodka?
BTW, does Anne know that we used the lipstick she is currently wearing to was used to write the word "ASS" on my ass cheeks last night?
I'm covered in bite marks and have a cracked rib - was a good weekend
Randomize
