He moved away. I mourned his dick all of Sunday. I feel a little better now.
Just got the test results back. All clean, Now whose an idiot for going bareback in South America for 3 months straight.
...She then said get into the spirit and started making firecracker noises while having sex
She should get an extra 30 days for that Georgia Rule movie......terrible.
I miss the good ol' days when we would yell at strangers from your balcony while wearing our mexican ponchos in the middle of the day.
what ever happened to our old dealer?
Hey do you think you can sew an adult onsie with easy access if you know what I mean!!?? It must have bunny feet.
ASS. GYMANSTICS. OLYMPICS. NOW!!!
Fried chicken is a must. Do strippers eat fried chicken or should I plan on something else?
I have come to the conclusion that my perfect boyfriend is a cardboard cutout of Link with a dildo attatched. Also, Merry Christmas.
Sangria Flip Cup was probably one of our worse drunken decisions
Literally the fucking master of salvaging the possibility of a blow job whilst also crushing somebody's dreams.
I SWEAR TO ALL THAT IS HOLY I HAVE NEVER WIPED MY GENITALIA ON ANY TYPE OF EMERGENCY RESPONSE VEHICLE!!
so, i take that as a legit invitation into his pants
I woke up and saw that my last google search was "Bacon neck".
You can't just bring up bondage and then stop answering me
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