I wanna come home
And do what?
Kiss. Rip clothes off. Repeat.
His vagina is bleeding blood all over the court
end the night at a gay bar...not sure how...but why the fuck do i have two condoms in my pocket?
At some point I made a semi-conscious decision that i was okay with sleeping in my own vomit.
I think I'm cybering, it's been a while and its more in depth than it was in 8Th grade.
i am about to cut my stepbrother's hair into a mohawk with the same clippers i use to trim my pubes. god is so on my side today.
So does it count as really great road-head if he ran over 3 mailboxes before realizing he was off the road?
My mom said that if she can come this weekend, she'll buy the weed.
I woke up with no pants, someone elses shirt, but my new years crown still on. That is dedication.
I literally just fucked insane clown pussy. 24 yo nut job moonlights at children's parties. Gave me head while still in full clown makeup from my kid's birthday party.
It sounds like drunken magic sprinkled w narcotics
No just a slight sexual miscommunication which led to a little (lot) vomiting by one party and a bruised sternum on the other party involved.
I can't even make a guess how that goes.
I just found a half a joint in my bed. . .don't know if this qualifies as a proud moment or a cry for help
I mean. I just want to sit in my bed and eat bagels. What's wrong with that?
BABE I MISS YOU SO MUCH LIKE THE SADNESS OVERWHELMS BONER ABILITY
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