I cant date a girl that sucks dick at sucking dick
Some guy said that sham wows were the same as regular shammys. needless to say you had to be restrained. you kept trying to 'slap chop' him.
We've been friends for six months, when do my benefits kick in?
We ran out of ice cubes so I used ice cream. Everyone thought that was the plan all along. I just went with it.
I feel strange, like something is off with my body
Yeah that's called sobering up, we've been drunk for the past 4 days
he could've at least fucked me twice. that's just common courtesy.
I'm sure he'll make the rejection quick and completely justified.
Hold on, I need to find something to wear that says "I don't contribute to your daughter's drug problem"
You had sex with him AND his man bun. Like not just him but also the bun.
I smoked all his weed and he hasn't noticed yet. But I might need a place to crash when he does
Woke up on my sisters couch, and it was like the start of a Terminator movie,my brother in law was passed out on the floor naked in the fetal position. We now call him Arnold. It was an epic night.
What's your opinion on eating ass? Just looking for a yes or no
The frequency with which I change my vibrator batteries is getting a little ridiculous....
A total of 3 guys left my apartment this morning. That was my first clue to my black out endeavors last night. Gotta love wine Wednesdays.
I couldn't find my contact solution so I thought mixing toothpaste and water would work
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