I'm too tired to go all the way tonight, especially if you're going to quote Katy Perry at me during
He just ordered a bottle of Beam at an Italian place for us to share.
I think I'm gonna wear a bikini to our final tomorrow...just so he knows that no fucks will be given on his test
So again no comment on the cleavage. I'm a bit disappointed. If those girls come together to make cleavage AND I send you a pic of it, you have to comment on it. That's like relationship 101.
Making a mobile stripper pole for the back of my truck memorial weekend. Is where dignity goes to die
I have the WORST cramps EVER. I think this is gods way of saying 'you're welcome, last warning. stop being a slut.'
You yelled to anyone that tried to help you "I have a burrito, what else could a girl want?"
I have just been informed that my company has ray guns. I WORK FOR ACTUAL BOND VILLAINS. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
HE HAS CHALLENGED MY BADNESS. I MUST CONQUER ALL THAT QUESTIONS MY POWER. BRING FORTH THE TIT PICS.
This time last year I was crying in a church parking lot without shoes or a bra, so the years can only go up from here
In between explaining the best feminist lenses for the myth of Persephone and doing vodka shots with my friends she dragged me into my car and gave me an Earth shattering blow job. Honestly I think I'm in love.
I'm armed with nothing but $4 lip gloss gum and my phone. Ready to take on the fucking world.
And he kept lifting up his shirt every few minutes to check if his nipples were still there
Like if I exploded right now there would be cum and fajitas everywhere.
I have acquired a mango...tonight is successful so far
Her name is susan
Randomize
