At a sweet 16. cant remember what shirt im wearing byt dnt worry im not sleeping w/ the guy who serves the chicken nuggets again
she has a miserable personality but its a good think you dont have sex with that
pussy has no personality
Amen to that
This girls a $30 bar tab from being bi
Good thing you left when you did - ended up getting banned from jimmy johns.
he has officially spend more money on me than any other boy. and its all gone to plan b. awesome.
I dont want to tell you. Lets just say that a lot of things are reminding me of your dick right now
I don't think we had sex because when I woke up he was still wearing the chicken suit.
It was so weird. She left to go to the bathroom and her older sister leaned towards me with a creepy smile and said, "You don't deserve her" and then continued to stare at me with a crazy expression for the rest of the evening.
That's kinky shit dude.
Is it a coincidence that the reminder on my phone to take my birth control is "I'm ready to party" from Bridesmaids?
his first fb message to me in 3 years was "is your cock open for business?" im blocking him
Binging muscle relaxers because when ur 33 you can no longer SHAKE IT LIKE A POLAROID PICTURE for 2hrs w/o consequences. Fuck you, Age.
2017 is my year to realize stuff. Move over Kylie Jenner
This whole Rob and Chyna drama is giving me trust issues. I'm about to text my ex and be like if you haven't already deleted my nudes, can you?
I need a sign that says “please don’t make plans with me if I’ve had two or more drinks. I will regret them. I will have bitter feelings towards you. Then I will cancel and feel guilty.”
Drunk me bought a cell phone last week and began texting sober me. The conversation between the two is still on going.
Randomize
