absolutely 100% incorrect. and i love you more you silk skinned goddess
Hey guys thanks for lettin me crash at your place for the weekend, I had a great time. PS I got three quarters of a hand job from an asian on the dance floor last night. True story.
Watching Miami Social reminded me of how much I miss snorting coke with burger king straws in a life guard hut on the beach until we noticed someone was drowning.
Did you save them?
Who?
I'm not inviting you over anymore if my cat keeps ending up in the freezer...
If we're like this now and women reach their sexual peak in their 30's, I can't even fathom what our futures hold.
it's a little hard to watch the basketball games with my family considering they keep cheering for the guy that i had a one night stand with...
I'm pretty sure that I'm earning a horrible reputation with your friends, but I'm having a fucking great time in the process.
i mad aa ber float. budweiser nd ice creem. it amzig.
Drink for every country you've never heard of.
Fuuuuuuuuuck
You know it's nice having a girlfriend who will lotion your balls for you
I DON'T WANT TO KNOW THE SCIENTIFIC REASONING BEHIND WHY I STARTED A HAREM ESPECIALLY NOT FROM A GUY IN THE HAREM!
The cop looked me right in the eye and apologized for cock blocking me.
not ubering you a puppy
I support your vibrator fueled lifestyle.
dont know if she was trying to start a lawnmower or jerk me off. still wasnt to bad though
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