marko just referred to some fat asian and a portly friend as Jupiter and one of its moons. unreal. hyte!
Yeah, we realized keeping you in a cage wasn't beneficial to us
Just tipped at a bar in cheerios. Suck it.
$1 pitcher night should be outlawed.
when i was alone, his dick was there for me...
On the brightside though, I found the motivation to clean my shower, it was right underneath my need to masturbate in said shower.
Yea, i was tied up and blindfolded. And someone was throwing chicken nuggets at my face.
its all coming back to me in waves....waves of humiliation and nausea.
I'm drugging my best friend. I'm like a whole new level of bitch.
It was horrifying, i havent seen a girls mouth open that wide since that one episode of Goosebumps..
This has been your unwelcomed wake-up call, brought to you by exes united. Have a good day, to opt out please type "STOP", to continue but act as though they do not exist please enter "DON'T CARE" for random daily wake up texts by exes united please press "PSYCHO!"
We're drinking vodka. Wine is for people who have to wake up in the morning.
you really need to remember next time not to write your name and phone number on the paper its wrapped in.
But what if it got lost?
its illegal. you dont want people to contact you if they find it.
you can't let guys come on your chest and then hog my blanket
I woke up to rachel asking "did anyone else fall out of a tree last night?"
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